Hey guys how are you?? You may or may not wonder what happened to me or where I disappeared to :).
Well here’s the deal…I’ve been in heart failure for 12 years (shock & awe I know) along with the fibromyalgia, diabetes, sleep apnea and on on.
Soooooo….here’s a short version of my long story 🙂
As you know, I was doing well, working out staying on my optifast products…then one day…BOOM!! All of a sudden I’m having these strange pains in my stomach….turns out I’m having problems with my gall bladder (it’s evil & it’s trying to destroy me). Sooo again, after weeks of being in and out of the ER and the doctors office, I see a surgeon who FINALLY tells me YES indeed I need surgery…
I can’t tell you how happy I was to hear that…then I had to be cleared for the surgery, uhh oooh,here comes trouble! I find out my heart is failing again and my heart cannot withstand a surgery 😦 so in short I have to just live with this pain….(until they get my heart functioning better, hopefully).
On another side I can’t be on optifast right now or even exercise 😦 it’s been a long blurry month…I’m on more medications and I’m on oxygen…they’re in the process of getting everything adjusted. So for now I’m extremely tired, in pain and dealing with a lot of emotions, but I always have faith!!! It’s been really hard,but……… I’m still here & I’m still smiling 🙂
Come check out my Facebook page…FacesByJ.Marie
I think this blog will become my sounding board for what in going through…not so much about my weight but my life.
Tonight I volunteered at my girls school….can you guess what I did?? The freaking bake sale lol!! I think I did pretty good in sales for them..I did eat 2 peanut butter cookies and guess what..I didn’t feel bad. Sometimes you have to give in to a craving….everyone who knows me knows just how much I love peanut butter cookies 🙂 so just eating 2 was good for me.
As a matter of fact that was great for me considering the day I had…but anyway I sat next to a beautiful grandmother who is 70 years old and going to college!! She was so sweet & funny…she asks me what my iPad is and then tells me she has a smart phone & no idea how to use it lol! She just lost a child and was there to support her grand children…it was such a pleasure to meet her and talk to her.
She really helped me to see that we can do whatever we put our minds too…I mean dang, here she is at 70, working & going to school & taking care of family… She really helped me to put things in perspective. I was considering stopping my weight loss program because I keep having these “cravings” and I started to feel like what’s the point…but I know I was just trying to punk out (as the kids would say lol).
I go to the clinic tomorrow and for once I’m not nervous about the scale or the two cookies…I’m going to continue on this journey and be successful!! I thank those who sent me such up building messages & my 2 friends who actually listed their animal 🙂 I am going to keep my head up and keep doing me…no more worrying about the fun suckers!!
(I included a picture of my new friend because she inspired me soo!)
Do you know what a fun sucker is?? It’s any one/thing/place/person that sucks the good energy out of ya… For me it’s Walmart,( 🙂 ) lol, negative people, draining (emotionally) and overly opinionated people.
It’s pretty hard to spot them….they come sometimes baring gifts, words of encouragement or even a great sale (this would be Walmart lol) when in the end all they do is bring you down and take your money (Walmart)….(they smile in ya face, all the time the want to take ya place…the backstabbers…hmmm who sang that song?? They got it right!!)
This is especially true when your trying to change your lifestyle…. People can think that they are being supportive but in reality they are sabotaging you….
If you know someone who has decided to become vegan (like me 🙂 ) give up dairy, white flour, bread or sugar..or they want to run a marathon, have weight loss surgery….or whatever….don’t tell them how you could never do that…tell them good job!!!!! It’s extremely hard to make changes….but not impossible!!!!
As my dirty little secret (my BFF) likes to always tell me…stay positive!! This may mean that you need to get rid of some fun suckers…and find some fulfilling friendships!!